Wedding… House… Both?

Yesterday I met a delightful young couple who were newly engaged, contemplating buying a property and saving for a (big) wedding. Their ability to save was strong, but their wedding guest numbers were larger than typical primary school student numbers. The cost would be significant.

They justifiably had concerns about their additional savings capacity and the cashflow implication over the short term if they took on a property.

I wondered how I could best tackle the topic of having both.

Weddings are an emotive thing. The same topic raised some interesting views and opinions on an investor portal, and it was interesting to see how some dedicated property investors had approached their own nuptials.

Stories ranged from big Greek Weddings to modest Registry Office paperwork, lavish parent-funded Indian Weddings and beach ceremonies.

What was interesting was that even on an investor portal where most people would expect to find pragmatic advice and clear mentions of compromise, many differing values shone through. One man suggested that his wedding day was the best day of his life, and he deliberately expressed that he had no regrets about the $60,000 price tag of his big day. Another recalled a casual ‘surprise’ beach wedding with fondness. A couple of people referenced the marriage success rate, and one comment struck me as a well-considered one. It related to the increased financial pressure on couples who do face a split when they haven’t got any equity each to springboard into their next chapter with. Interesting that a property acquisition could be viewed with individual future outcomes in mind, but a risk buffer is an individual and personal element for every person.

With one third of Australian marriages ending in divorce, the practical risk-assessment has to be considered.

I posed the question to the forum; “How can we encourage our children, friends, colleagues to put wedding plans into a different kind of perspective?”

The answers were varied. As expected, the pragmatists in the group had some great answers, and many were around the ideal of having both a wedding and a property. The wedding cost-savings tips were numerous; from enlisting family and friends’ help to going overseas for a cost-effective alternative, and the beach wedding also got a mention.

Talking to many modern brides and grooms (including younger cousins whose wedding dates still add excitement to my calendar now that such events are few and far between for us), we also see an increase in the “Wishing Well” approach. Like it or loathe it, it’s an effective way for couples to recoup some of the wedding cost blow-out they have copped (or avoid ten toasters and other redundant gifts now that 77% of Australian couples are cohabitation before they wed). Wishing Wells come in all forms, from gigantic bird cages to dressed up boxes with a letter-box style slit for the wedding guests to post their card and cash.

Crowd-funded wedding? Maybe not totally funded, but certainly sponsored.

While the older generation have mixed views on Wishing Wells, it’s a helpful and supportive way for our young nuptials to celebrate their union and still potentially consider investing or home ownership at the same time, (pending how lavish their wedding actually is).

Considerable expenses can be reduced with some clever planning. From the initial expense of a diamond ring to the selection of the venue (and importantly, the date of the venue), the honeymoon, the dress and the photographer, some cost-saving options include;

• Selecting a semi-precious stone over a diamond, or opting for an estate diamond ring (maybe not everyone’s dream, but hey, I love an old Art Deco setting),
• Tighter guest list (hard for many cultures, no doubt),
• A different day to Saturday
• A travel destination with a competitive rate in the off-peak season
• A good photographer with a lower cost model (they certainly do exist)

Marriage and weddings are a very personal thing, and for those who are keen to build their property wealth or springboard into their first home, the enormity of a wedding bill can challenge many savings regimes. Prioritising the savings into two separate contribution piles is a good start and setting time horizons for both events can help keep the goals on track.

Idealising about a ‘forever’ home can be a mistake for many couples who have a plan to make it the perfect, long-term, family acquisition. Unlike a marriage that we prefer to think is forever, a home doesn’t have to be. It can be a start. Or a foot on the ladder. A stepping stone. A sensible investment property that is suitable for the couple to inhabit for a few years.

We aren’t meant to nail our dream home in the first go.

All things need to start modestly and as our careers develop, or wages/salaries increase over time, our other financial nest eggs grow and our own personal and family needs change, the option to upgrade will likely become apparent.

Couples can have both. They usually just need a bit of compromise.